Where is IamPhoenix?

It should be apparent to the MMA Nation (by now) that Iamphoenix has gone underground.  The Nation has not heard from him since Dec. 22nd.  At the same time, Rocky Balboa, 2-time world heavyweight boxing champion, has reported to the police that his world championship belts are lost.  Balboa believes that ...Phoenix is the culprit.  Surveillance cameras spotted  IamPhoenix near the belts.  Rocky and the police believe that Iamphoenix has changed his identity.  IwasaPacker became IamPhoenix after he was censored by CBS.  He has been censored numerous times.  IamPhoenix has now become IamaSuspectintheTheftofRocky'sbelts. 

Police will question: KingLev69, HardyBoys55, AJWalMart, PapaJohnBalsamo, et al.

We will find and prosecute him according to the law.

Balboa

Yo Paulie!  The police are investigating the theft of my championship belts. IamPhoenix last posted Dec. 22nd.  Several days before the cancelled fight.  Then there is the mysterious auto accident which I believe is a hoax.  He lied to me once before.  He is a crafty fella.  Banned many times by CBS.  He assumes many identities.  IwasaPacker before he became IamPhoenix before Iamasuspect...  As you can see, the MMA Nation is not talkin' to me.  What I expected.  No one knows nothin'.  I spend every waking moment searching for Phoenix and my belts.  Stay tuned Paulie.  Remember what I told Mason Dixon in Rocky 6: I ain't over till it's over.

Rocco

California Police Superintendent Pinky Lee reported to the Balboa family that the monkey is breaking and may be ready to talk soon.  Supt. took Paulie's advice and forced the monkey aka IAMMONKEY to watch12 consecutives hours of monkey movies: see above.  Monkey was fed ripe bananas and water from the tap.  Monkey had requested bottled water.  Monkey is being represented by Soupy Sales.  Rumor has it that Sales is appealing to the Humane Society and World WildLife Federation Fund for assistance.  Police can hold  IAMMONKEY for another 48 hours.  After which, monkey has to be charged with an alleged crime or released. 

Meanwhile, informants have told police that IAMPHOENIX, IAMMONKEY's playmate and alleged thief of Rocky's championship belts, is driving across country (from California) to New York where his trainer, JesterLev69 lives. 

Balboa 

Paulie has notified the Canadian Mounted Police to be on the lookout for a young 20 something Californian with a tan.  He speaks slowly and is capable of writing one or two sentences before he tires.  He likes monkeys so he may have a trunk full of bananas.  Although IamPhoenix is purportedly headed towards New York state, Canadian Border Patrol are on the lookout for Phoenix and Rocky's championship belts.

Phoenix has ties to the MMA Underground.  So he may be wearing a disguise.

Rocky

Meanwhile, in New York City, Jester is being questioned by the NYPD.  He may not be able to attend the New Year's Eve celebration in Times Square.  New York's finest are checking out a purported hideout in the Bowery near Little Italy and ChinaTown.  JesterLev69 has been seen in the Bowery on occasions.

Rocco

Yo Paulie!  This is Rocky!  I am sending ya a private message.  Here is an update on Phoenix:

Phoenix has resurfaced on the thread entitled: The Oath.  He claims that he was on Christmas vacation visiting family and friend.  I believe he is on the run after stealing my championship belts. 

Informants revealed to the cops that he is traveling across the country from California to New York where JesterLev007 lives.

I believe he is half-way across the country by now and probably stopped at an internet coffee shop to find out what he been happening on the MMA blog.  He probably wants to know my reaction to the theft and whether or not he is a suspect. 

Monkey is ready to crack and confess. 

If Phoenix is on the run, then he will probably arrive in New York city in a couple of days.  JesterLev69 has a hideout in the Bowery (according to the NYPD).  The widow Mrs. Conti has connections in Little Italy (just a few blocks from the Bowery).  Maybe you should get in touch with the widow.

Do ya want to call Gazzo in Philly?  The MMA radicals have the hots for a young woman named Stacy Kiebler.  Maybe Gazzo and the boys can convince Stacy to work with us in apprehending Phoenix.

Phoenix is pretending that nothing bad has happened.  He was away having a good time when the belts were stolen.  This is an unsound alibi. Truth is: Monkey is ready to implicate Phoenix and himself in the theft of those belts from the Fight Club on Christmas Night.

Phoenix and I were scheduled to fight Dec. 25th.  Phoenix backed out because he spent too much time playing with his monkey and unprepared to fight.  The belts were locked in a cage.  The winner of the fight was to receive the belts.  Since Phoenix chickened out of the fight, no one showed up that night.  I stayed home.  You stayed home.  Fight fans stayed home.  Opportune time for Phoenix and his monkey to steal the belts.  Kinda like what happened to OJ in Las Vegas.  Except I ain't no bad guy.  I represent the fighting American spirit: truth, justice and the American way.  Kinda like Superman except I ain't got no cape.  Just boxing gloves.  I ain't got no locker either.  Thanks to Mickey.

Anyhow, keep in touch and let me know what Mrs. Conti thinks about getting involved and what Gazzo thinks about getting involved too. 

I am afraid Phoenix is gonna sell the belts on EBay and make a lot of $$$$$$$.

Your bother-in-law

Rocco

P.S. This post is private and should not be read by Phoenix, Jester, Hardy, AJ,  Papa, et. al.  I don't want them to know what we know.

News Bulletin:  Monkey cracks under intense questioning and TV viewing of KIng Kong, Mighty Joe Young and Tarzan (Cheetah) movie re-runs.  Implicates Phoenix and himself in the Christmas night heist of Rocky's championship belts.  Humane Society and World WildLife Federation are outraged by interrogation techniques used by the cops. 

Details to follow...

ACLU doubts monkey has credibility to implicate Phoenix.  Can a primate accuse a human of wrongdoing?  Humane Society accuses cops of offering monkey a bunch of bananas in return for confession.

Details to follow...

Cops say monkey's lawyer - Soupy Sales - was present throughout interrogation.   Lawyer watched same re-runs as monkey.  California Police Supt., Pinky Lee, denies any wrongdoing by his dept.  Pinky Lee revealed that California zoo officials were present during the interrogation.

Details to follow... 

Monkey to spend several days in jail before bail hearing.  Rocky's lawyers want to keep the monkey in his cage (jail).  They are afraid he will jump bail and return to the jungle.  Several hundred PETA protesters appeared outside the central LA jail chanting: Stop Monkeying Around!  Free the Monkey!  All We Are Sayin' Is Give the Monkey a Chance!

Details to follow...

Rocky accuses CBS Sports / MMA Nation of trying to hide this thread.  This thread should be the  #1 thread on the MMA / Boxing blog.  MMA fans are in denial.  MMA fans are supporting a monkey thief.  MMA Nation want to censor boxing and its 2-time champion, Rocky Balboa.  MMA fans are trying to prevent the U.S. nation from learning the truth.  That is, Phoenix and his monkey stole Rocky Balboa's championship belts on Christmas night.  This is an embarassment to the MMA Nation.

Details to follow...   

IamPhoenix and his playmate monkey are goin' to jail.  Period!  MMA Nation was / is negligent in the pursuit of justice.  I accuse MMA of obstruction of justice. 

Details to follow... 

Here is an update:

NYPD raid JesterLev69's Bowery hideout.  Cops find plenty of nuts for his squirrel.  As you recall, Lev00 is into squirrels.  Read his motto.  No sign of Phoenix.

Monkey's bail hearing New Year's Eve.

Rocky's lawyers seek FOIL from MMA Nation.

Phoenix continues to plead innocence.  California cops will interview co-workers and friends tomorrow.  Meanwhile, Phoenix is nowhere to be found.  Just because he posts messages on the MMA blog does not mean he is sitting at home.  Rocky, Paulie and California cops believe Phoenix is on the run.  Yesterday's post to the Oath thread revealed that Phoenix sent the post from Chicago.  Why is Phoenix in Chicago?  He is a California girlie boy kinda guy.  Phoenix continues to insist that he was with friends over the past 5 days.  Yet he is on the run in the middle of the country.  Chicago cops believe he is headed to Cleveland, Philly (Rocky's hometown) and eventually New York City where he will meet JesterLev00.  Phoenix does not know that Jester's Bowery hideout was raided by NYC cops.

Rocky's lawyers are petitioning the MMA Nation through FOIL (Freedom of Information Law).  What did the Nation know before the theft and now?  What about the Oath thread?  Several private messages were  relayed between Phoenix, Jester, Hardy, Papa, AJWalMart.  Lawyers intend to subpoena those messages.

Paulie has notified the Canadian Mounted Police.

Philly gangster Gazzo has been informed by Paulie that Phoenix may be headed to Philly.  Perfect place to sell the belts.  Bigger demand in Philly.

Mrs. Conti and Little Italy gangsters have been scouring the Bowery in pursuit of Jester's hideout.  NYPD found it first.

Stacy Kiebler may cooperate with Gazzo.  She has no use for Phoenix, Jester and Papa.  Stacy has threatened to tell all to Mrs. Lev.